Tuesday, February 2, 2010

Lost Season Six Premier Gut Reactions

1. The reason the Smoke Monster (let's go with Smo-Mo until they give us a name) can't go home is because he has a job to finish before he can leave. That job is to regain control of the Island on behalf of the Universe (see my earlier post). Jacob was in the way of that mission (psst- he still is).

2. Jacob knew he was going to die so he recruited Hurley back to the Island to be his mouthpiece...his prophet.

3. No idea what's going on with the alternate reality stuff.

4. Sun and Jin can now find each other.

5. Old Jack and old Ben are back, thankfully. Old Ben is going to be awesome. New Sayid.

6. Lots of people not on the plane this time, including Michael and Walt and the entire tail section.

7. Hurley was wearing a red shirt...just sayin'.

8. Juliette was the best actress on the show. Sad to see her go.




Sunday, January 31, 2010

My Great Big LOST Theory


So I just finished rewatching season 5. I've had a big picture-type theory of what's going on for a long time now. I think it was just solidified this time through and I'd like to run it past you. Goes like this:

The question the entire series is asking is, 'Can we be redeemed and how?' So far the show has given us two options, and they're really just the two options that we've historically been tending toward as humans. They are, in the black trunks, fate (AKA destiny, faith, religion, etc. - things outside of our control), or The Universe, and, in the white trunks, human effort (AKA science, violence, manipulation, progress, free will, etc. - the things we control), or The Island. In other words, are we responsible for our own redemption or not?

We know from Charlie's story that when the Universe decides that it's your time to go, there's not much you can do about it. If you somehow manage to cheat death, 'The Universe has a way of course-correcting'. If you're not shot in the neck by an arrow on a booby trapped trail in the jungle like you're supposed to be, you'll probably drown in an underwater communication station when Rasputin detonates a hand grenade. It's all so subtle. However, due to some special geomagnetic properties and a little crazy voodoo, the Island has managed to escape the iron clutches of the Universe. It's the one anomaly in an otherwise well functioning deterministic world, and the Universe wants it back. So the Universe abandons it's usual subtleties in this case for more direct action in the form of the Smoke Monster, or Smokey (Smo-Mo?). A bit too overt, don't you think? Well, these are drastic times and the Universe is getting desperate. Smokey goes around the Island jungles blowing up trees and staring people down...and judging them. He also has a really cool incarnational feature. We've seen him use it to take on the forms of deceased folks like Yemi, Alex, Boone, Locke's dad, and more recently, John Locke himself (was he Kate's horse too?). I don't think he's Christian or Walt however, but who knows with this show? Smokey has also appeared in the form of another conspicuous character whom we can know only as The Man In Black.

We met The Man In Black on a beach with the elusive and mysterious Jacob while they were watching the Black Rock sail in at the beginning of the season 5 finale. Here we have our two cosmic nemeses personified and conversing. The Universe, in the form of The Man In Black, and the Island, in the form of Jacob, conveniently garbed in white. There is some ominous dialogue between the two and we learn that The Man In Black really wants to kill Jacob, but hasn't yet found his 'loophole' allowing him to do so. Well, by the end of the episode he's found it, but first a little background.

At the beginning of season 5 the Universe has a real problem - some of the survivors of 815 have left the Island. This means the anomaly has spread to the mainland. This needs to be rectified immediately if the Universe is to remain in control of things so He, or Smokey, or whatever takes on the form of the deceased John Locke (he's been called Alter-Locke so let's just go with that) and convinces Richard to convince the real Locke (who's just been shot and is in the crashed Beechcraft) that he needs to go back to LA and convince the awol survivors that they're supposed to return to the Island. It's their destiny after all. Richard also informs Real Locke that in order to do so he's going to have to die. Hard to masquerade as someone if they're already at the party. Also, a resurrected leader just has so much more authority.

Now, there's a chronology issue here that I can't really account for. Alter-Locke is assumed to be leading Richard and the whipped Ben (whom he tricked into submission by becoming his dead daughter under the Temple and demanding that he obey Locke) around the jungle in present day (well, 2007 anyway). How is it then that they come upon Real Locke as he's wounded and looking for guidance? I suppose he could have jumped into the future after being shot by Ethan since that part of the story happened during the flashes caused by Ben moving the Island. This isn't really a hole in my theory, incidentally, as I don't remember the show explaining the chronology of that scene at all. Whether I'm right or not, that one needs to be explained.

Anyway, so Real Lock is back in the real world thinking he's recruiting his old friends back to the Island on behalf of the Island when he's really doing it on behalf of the Universe. He's playing for the other side and he doesn't even know it. Go easy on him though, neither he nor Jack, nor Ben for that matter, are aware that there's a cosmic struggle for control going on. The Island is all they know and they naturally assume that everything that has happened is because of the Island. The Island, however, has made a genius move.

The second the folks the world will come to know as the Oceanic Six are far enough off the Island, It moves...through time...all but ensuring that those who left will never be able to return. Check and mate. After all, there's no way the Universe is going to act as overtly on the mainland as it has on the Island in order to rectify things. The anomaly has been successfully exported and for a second it seems that it's the beginning of the end for the Universe.

Not so fast...

Locke, Eloise, and Ben somehow wrangle everyone except Aaron (that might be important later) back to the Island thanks to a little manipulation a-la Alter-Locke and the Universe once again has the upper hand. As the rest of the season 5 finale plays out it appears that the Universe has the Island up against the ropes and all that remains is that final blow. And it comes in the form of Ben killing Jacob. See, the Universe seems to be a Rocky fan, only instead of raising his fists in triumph he kicks Jacob into the fire. The Island, however likes Star Wars better, particularly the part where Obi-Wan allows Vader to kill him. That, or he might have been reading the Gospels during the long nights in the shadow of the statue.

Ok, now to the H-bomb. Everything that happened there is pretty straight forward. If they destroy the pocket of energy in 1977, then it can't crash their plane in 2004 (or whenever). Here are a couple of thoughts though.

First, this is the event that triggers the birthing issues on the Island. There's been a lot of speculation about Juliette being pregnant since she clearly touches her belly when Rose offers her some tea in the jungle (this is TV code for 'she's pregnant' just like the red shirt she was wearing at the time is code for 'she's gonna die'). She's not pregnant however. The writers were tipping their hand to something else regarding pregnancy - that she's about to cause the curse that plagues her during her time with the Others. It's ironic that Juliette makes the bed she's going to have to sleep in, and that's exactly the kind of thing this show likes.

Second, this is the ultimate exercise in human control of history. Our 'heros' think they're allowed to do whatever they want because it's all in an effort to undo everything and none of it will have happened anyway should it work. They can kill all kinds of innocent people and convince themselves that it's actually a virtuous act. Here we see another example of the bad guys thinking they're the good guys. I was so proud of Kate, Juliette, and Sawyer for saving young Ben's life, even though they know full well what he grows up to be. But they really let me down here.

By shooting Ben in an attempt to control his own future, Sayid ends up creating the monster he tried to prevent. By trying to prevent everyone from ever coming to the Island, Juliette creates the problem she was recruited to fix. Likewise, killing Jacob and detonating the H-bomb, while they will appear to work at first, will come back to bite both parties in their respective asses.

So there you have it, not really in a neat little package but more like a bunch of disjointed chicken scratch on a crumpled up piece of paper I just threw at you. The writers of Lost are telling the human story in a whacked out super cool artistic way. The Island is the Garden of Eden and the Tree of Knowledge of Good and Evil has been eaten from. What will our friends do with their new pseudo-godlike knowledge of events and killing power? They'll be selfish. Who will redeem them? I should mention here that I'm not convinced that either Fate or Human Effort will be the savior. In fact, I don't think either the Universe or the Island care much about anyone. I think it could be Desmond's kid, Charlie. Maybe Aaron. But being a Christian I'm taught to look for third party redeemer babies.

There's a ton more that could be said and many other conspicuous scenes and one-liners I could recite to back up my theory, but I'll save it for the comments section. This is not an airtight theory by any means and I could be overlooking piles of stuff (like Jacob going around touching everyone). Hell, I'm probably way off on everything, but season 6 starts tomorrow night and I wanted to get this posted before then to secure a potential prophet status for myself. Leave your thoughts below and let's have some fun with this.



Sunday, January 3, 2010

Dear Mr. Favre...


Dear Mr. Favre,
It really bothered me when you defected to the Vikings, but not anymore. There is simply no question now that we're better off with Aaron, and will continue to be for quite a while. Feel free to stay in Minnesota as long as you like. It doesn't matter that you beat us twice. It doesn't matter that you won the division. Our GM made the right decision by not putting up with your crap any longer. We had a QB waiting in the wings who is at least as good as you are (psst...he's better). Sure, he lacks the experience you have, but now thanks to you he'll get it. The only down side to you leaving is that now, for the first time in my life, Minnesota has a real QB (and it's kinda cute to watch Vikings fans talk trash. They've been wanting to do it for so long). But we know that's going to change soon, don't we? And when it does, we'll go back to being the only team in our division with a quality QB - something we couldn't have said had you stuck around another year.

What I'm trying to say is, thank you for making our team better. When you finally do retire in year or so, and Minnesota is once again left without a QB, I'll thank you for making them worse (and incidentally, thanks for getting Childress that contract extension). The line you hear all the time, usually from ESPN, is, 'The NFL is a win now league' or 'You can't keep looking at the future of your team at the expense of this season' (something the Packers management apparently didn't do anyway), but the only people in the league who actually believe that are Jerry Jones and Al Davis...or should we throw Childress in there too? I quit believing it sometime after 1996. In the words of Ron Wolf, the man you owe your entire career to, if you only win one Super Bowl in 16 years, that season was 'a fart in the wind'.

You might think that I'm pissing on your 'legacy' - that I'm forgetting about all the glory years you gave us. My answer is, 'Nope. You already did that. You undid all of it when you signed with the Vikings.'

So stay there as long as you want. You don't mean much to us over here anymore. As for 'sticking it to Thompson'...you didn't do that. Or if you did, A-Rod undid it. You crapped on all the fans, sure. I hope that felt good. We obviously had it coming for supporting you all those years. But you're dead to us now. We just don't care. You were a king over here. You're nothing more than the Vikings quarterback now.

Have fun,
Greg

Saturday, December 19, 2009

You Gotta Be Moved By Something...

The following is a list of songs that for some unknown reason I find particularly moving. This isn't necessarily a list of my favorite tunes, just songs that, because of nostalgia, lyrics, or any other reason, surprise me by how much they move something inside me. Most of them fall into the 'guilty pleasures' category. They're in no real order and this is by no means a complete list. Kind of a fun category, so feel free to leave your own in the comments section below.

-Love Bites and Hysteria, Def Leopard
-Hold Me Now, The Thompson Twins
-Raining at Sunset, Chris Thile (that whole Not All Who Wander record is ridiculously good)
-Silent All These Years, Tori Amos
-Take On Me, A-HA
-Clockshop, Billy McLaughlin
-Anything by Arvo Part
-Pacing the Cage, Bruce Cockburn
-The Scientist, Coldplay
-Sally and Jack, Mike Perry and the Longbeds
-Anna Begins, Counting Crows
-Spur Road Speed King, Doug Geeting
-Voices, Dream Theater
-A live version of a Kelly Joe Phelps tune I ripped off YouTube that I call Riverside but wasn't titled
-Kicking, Kevin Moore
-Comes a Time, Mutual Admiration Society
-Almost everything on Patty Griffin's Impossible Dream record
-My Favorite Memory, Merle Haggard
-In The Light of Common Day, Phil Keaggy
-Just Like Paradise, David Lee Roth
-Chris Thile's smokin' 16th note solo in Stranded in Kodiak
-Samson, Regina Spektor
-Life in a Northern Town, The Dream Academy
-Show Don't Tell, Rush
-Paper Airplane, Willy Porter
-When it's Love, Van Halen
-In My Time of Need, Ryan Adams
-Most of the Riverdance soundtrack, Bill Whelan (I know this sounds embarrassing, and I can live without the tap dancing, but Whelan is a genius...seriously)
-Sweet Child O' Mine, Guns n' Roses
-All These Years, Sawyer Brown
-In The Air Tonight, Phil Collins
-Almost any well done Gregorian Chant
-Get You Back, Shawn Lane
-Merry Christmas Mr. Gorbachev, Stephen Bennett
-They Dance Alone, Sting
-Music for a Found Harmonium, Penguin Cafe Orchestra
-I Love, Tom T. Hall
-Little Rain, Never Let Go, Clap Hands, Time and a crap load of other Tom Waits tunes
-Resplendent, Bill Mallonee and Vigilantes of Love



Wednesday, December 16, 2009

Woodchopper's Ball, '09


I got invited back to The Woodchopper's Ball in Kent, OH again this year. The Ball is a benefit concert for the Northeast Ohio Coalition for the Homeless organized each year by my good friend Brian Henke. He assembles the 9 best acoustic guitarists he can get his hands on from across the country and throws them all on stage, three at a time, round-robin style. This year I was honored to share the stage with Kyle Reeder and Tim (and his son Myles) Thompson. The three of us make up the 2008 Winfield International Fingerstyle Guitar Championship winners. The show was once again a huge success.

Since I had to play in Menomonie, WI the previous night my buddy Chuck Wood flew me down there in his plane, a 1970 Piper Arrow II. With exception to a little wind that slowed us up the flight down there was great. We turned a 12+ hour drive into a 4 hour flight.

We crashed at Brian's home in Cleveland, along with Kyle and his wife Bethany, Tim and Myles, Helen Avokian, and Eric Wilson. Kyle is a monster fingerstyle chicken picker and he showed me 'everything he knows'. The weather made it too dangerous for us to fly out Sunday morning like we had planned so Kyle invited me and Brian to join him for the second half of his show at a local music store, a show he did to fill in for the absent Todd Hallawell. We had a lot of fun. Even got to jam on a Christmas tune.

Monday Morning. Time to fly home...or not. Brian took us to the airport in Kent, a good hour away from his house. We loaded our bags into the plane and Chuck went inside to do his preflight stuff. Bad news. We weren't leaving then either.

The weather had been wet and overcast for the past few days. We could have taken off and gotten above it easily enough, and the skies were clear back home, but we needed a fuel stop in between and couldn't find anywhere to get down. The ceilings were down around 200 feet. Descend through the clouds and the runway is right there. Any miscalculation and there's trouble. There was also the icing to worry about.

Brian Henke is one of the kindest people I've ever met and I'm sure he would have turned around to come and get us, but he would have wasted more in gas by the time it was all said and done than a hotel room would have cost us so we had a guy at the airport give us a ride to the hotel.

Downtown was three miles away, according to the signs, so we started walking. Found a little mexican place to get some food and continued on. We ended up in a movie theater watching The Blind Side about Ravens LT Michael Oher. I was at Lambeau Field watching him play the Packers just a week earlier but had no idea who he was so I guess I didn't pay much attention to him.

On the way home Chuck had the idea to stop into Dominoes and order a pizza to be delivered to the hotel and ride back with the delivery guy. It took some light-hearted guilt tripping but we talked him into it. Back at the hotel we watched Evan Almighty and Chuck did some more weather recon.

Tuesday morning. Rainy and fog. Chuck seems determined. We screamed down the runway nearly blind, pulled up and were totally blind. We had to climb through 6,000 feet of clouds, picking up ice along the way, unable to even see the nose of the plane before we got above it. Chuck had done this stuff before, but not me. A quarter-inch of ice is a serious problem for a little plane, and my guts were telling me that we were doing circles. The instruments weren't. I got that kind of scared that burns holes in your guts. Chuck got us above it all with no problems.

The skies up above the clouds are staggeringly beautiful. All of a sudden it's blue and sunny and the clouds go from a dirty wet grey to brilliant, flowing white. Crazy that this stuff has always been up here, but before man started flying no one ever got to see it. The top of the clouds was at 6,000 feet and we cruised at 8,000. 2,000 feet below us the cloud layer looks like it's about 30 feet down. There are hills and mountains, valleys and canyons, and a rainbow of perfect concentric circles below us, traveling with us the whole way. We talked about how all the really beautiful things in the world are the most dangerous - mountains, the ocean, women...and now clouds. The movie at the hotel last night ended with a giant rainbow, a promise from God to look after us. It felt good to have that reminder tracking with us. We were bucking 50 mph headwinds and not moving as fast as we had hoped to so we dropped to 6,000 feet to try to get under it and found the clouds, now casting shadows from the angle of the sun, even more beautiful .

When we left the clouds were still hanging thick over Lansing, IL where we had to stop for fuel and we were counting on them to clear out before we got there. We could see the edge of them on the horizon and were worried that we would have to descend before we reached it and have to deal with more ice. We started our descent 5 miles out and that's exactly where the clouds broke. We even got to play around some friendly giant cumulous clouds on the way down. Once we got on the ground Chuck said, 'ten minutes earlier and the clouds would have been right here.' Afterward I thought of the winds and the rainbow.

Clear but bumpy ride the rest of the way home. This kind of stuff makes me hope this music thing takes for me.





Thursday, December 10, 2009

Why I Am Not a Pacifist

Just a quick thought I had while driving home from Eau Claire tonight. The term 'pacifism' is an unhelpful one. If being a pacifist means that I never want to throttle someone, then I am not a pacifist. If it means that I don't think there's anyone in the world who needs killing, then I am not a pacifist. If, however, it means that I recognize that Jesus is Lord and rules over a peaceful kingdom and commands us to be a nonviolent people shaped by the Gospel and devoted to loving our enemies, then I guess I qualify.

But, of course, that's not what it means, at least not practically. Pacifism is almost always presented as a proposition rather than a practice. And subscribing to a proposition like pacifism doesn't make you peaceful any more than a PETA membership makes you a vegetarian.

Same thing with the Gospel. It's no proposition either. A bunch of people agreeing that Jesus died and was raised doesn't change anything. Just gives us one more group of obnoxious folks shooting off their mouths to everyone who isn't like them that we get to write off. If, however, those people are committed to really living under the lordship of Christ, if we really do love our neighbors and our enemies, putting our own lives aside in the name of Christ for the redemption of the world (and by 'world' I mean social orders, suffering, injustice, etc. - not just individual souls), then there's hope. But if we subscribe to the myth of redemptive violence instead of the Gospel, then we're not Christian - at least not in that area - and that part of our thinking hasn't been shaped by the Gospel. Big part. We've missed something very close to the heart of the Gospel as well. Big something.

If we really do follow Christ in his sufferings - if we would rather be victims, loving our enemies more than ourselves, our rights, and our property - that doesn't make us pacifists. It just makes us Christian.

Peace on Earth.

Tuesday, December 1, 2009

Volume One Feature


A giant THANK YOU! to the folks at Volume One Magazine for featuring me in their latest issue. Click here to see it.